"All he wants is YOU"

As often as I can, I head over to St. Edward's and walk the beautiful trails. It doesn't matter how many times I go there, it always seems to boost me up, give me clarity and peace of mind, and keep me grounded. There is something about nature that way. 

Just last week, Dallin was strapped in the carrier facing me, and we were walking our usual route. This was the first time after weeks of snow and it was good to see green again. 

I said, "Buddy, look at these beautiful trees! Look how green everything is." But instead of him looking around, he had his eyes fixed on me. The Spirit whispered, "you could be in the most beautiful places in the whole world but all he wants is YOU." 

It honestly wouldn't matter if we were climbing mountains, splashing the water at the beach, or in a forested area like St. Ed's. He thought I was enough. Just getting a smile from me and a deep look into his eyes was really what he wanted. He wanted my attention. 

This reiterated much of what I've heard that all kids want is their parent's attention. Behavior is reinforced for good or bad because of the attention they receive from them. 

In my own life, as a child myself, I do long for my mom's attention and maybe that's why we have a call date every Monday. And maybe growing up, I wanted my dad's attention and thus the best way I knew to do that was to watch BYU football with him every Saturday. ;) (Hi Dad! I know you read this. Haha). 

But I also long for attention from my Heavenly Parents and Jesus Christ. My mom gave a great suggestion that during meditation imagine the Savior ministering. I tried this out and loved it. 

I have this certain meditation music playing, because music of any kind helps me to visualize, and I imagined myself dressed up in New Testament time. I'm running, getting in between crowds, going up on hill tops, all because I want to see the Savior and be near Him. I'm watching Him as He heals certain people.

 And before my meditation is up, at some point in this visualization, He looks up from what He's doing and He looks right at me. 

It's as if He's saying, "I see you." This encompasses everything that I might be feeling. He sees me and knows me. Fully. All that I'm experiencing in my life at that moment He knows about. And just getting His attention, seeing His eyes in mine, is all I want.